Really I am just very happy to be myself. I love my life and wouldn’t trade it for anything. I know how lucky I am. I’m doing pretty much exactly what I want to be doing. I’m faced with some challenges, what mother of four teenagers isn’t? I wouldn’t want to be my husband. I wouldn’t want his responsibilities, his stress or his schedule.
He had to go to a meeting in Brussels this week. His flight from our city to Toronto was cancelled due to a heavy snow fall and he suddenly had to make a three hour drive so that he wouldn’t miss his flight. His flight was delayed so that he missed his connecting flight. I didn’t even know that it wasn’t a direct flight. His luggage got lost. He was late for the first day of the meeting. He was also going to miss our daughter’s 13th birthday. I was happy to not be him.
I suppose that it’s also normal to occasionally envy your spouse. He has great self confidence, he gets satisfaction from his job, he has an even keeled personality, he gets to interact with so many people on a daily basis through work and he’s in Brussels.
The Artiste is meeting his dad in Brussels. After almost 5 months my husband gets to see our son in the flesh. To embrace him in a great big bear hug and to plant a good one on his cheek. To just be with him. To listen to and to laugh at his crazy stories. To hang out and to share a few meals together.
They’ve phoned me and we’ve spoken. I love talking to my son. Berlin was amazing, exciting and edgey. Men will drink beer at breakfast there. Truly a utopia! Bruges looks like a fairy tale city. He has a new love of french fries dipped in mayonnaise (so unappealing if you ask me) and they’ve been eating Belgian chocolates to their hearts’ content. It felt so good to hear all of this from my son.
Then I spoke to my husband.
“How does he look?”
“He looks great.”
“Give him a big hug and kiss.”
“Are you having a good time together?”
Suddenly my throat felt tight and my eyes got watery.
Sometimes, I envy my husband.