As you know I haven’t been blogging much of late. It’s a funny thing, blogging. I do it anonymously with the full knowledge that people I know are reading this. I really try very hard not to write anything that I wouldn’t say out loud in front of my family (most of them anyway) or in front of friends and neighbours.
Sometimes I wonder if iI need a stronger verbal filter. My husband would agree with this thought, he’s all filter.
The other day I saw that there is a book for sale on Amazon that has a title referring to the fact that Blogging is a narcissistic act. That bothers me. I mean really, who wants to think of themselves as a narcissist? I prefer to think of other people that way and as myself as a curmudgeon with hermitic (is that even a word?) tendencies – it’s a family thing.
Today as I was in the parking lot making my way to the grocery store (AGAIN!) I was stopped by a very nice woman that I have not seen in quite a while. I have already told you that the grocery store is the epicenter of my social life haven’t I? She confessed to me that she’s been reading my blog lately but not commenting. I’m not surprised that she’s not commenting, really only my sisters and a kind-hearted woman in France comment with any regularity. Thanks you three. Back on track here, I was slightly flummoxed to think of her reading me. I began to feel as though I was actually living out that classic nightmare where you discover yourself to be out in public, naked. She was looking me in the eye and there was a smile on her face, not a look of horror so I knew that I was fully clothed, yet I could not help blushing.
I began to write as a mental exercise. For myself. Then I started to hope that I would get read, enjoyed, possibly appreciated and maybe, just maybe anticipated. I don’t live in a very anonymous city. It’s hard not to be a little known when you have a husband in a somewhat public position at work, four children and there are no other people in the city with your last name. Yes, if you know one of them, then you know me. As much as a blog is for public consumption it is also very personal. What an odd dichotomy.
So I guess that this comes down to a little request. If you’re going to be kind enough to read my writing, could I ask you to go one step further and stop by the comment section just to say “Hi, I’m here.”? I think that, that might help me to feel as though I’ve at least managed to put on my big comfy robe.